Since Donald Trump was elected and has now been inaugurated as the 47th president of the United States of America, he hasn’t wasted time in sharing his plans to cut federal spending and reduce the size of government. To do this, Trump, using an executive order on day one in office, created a presidential advisory commission called the Department of Government Efficiency, or the DOGE, which will now be led by Elon Musk alone (after Vivek Ramaswamy stepped down to run for governor of the state of Ohio). In any case, the DOGE better get hoppin’ as I have a story of government waste for you today…

I’m originally from Milwaukee, Wisconsin, and have been living in Switzerland since 2001. Even though I got my Swiss citizenship in 2008, I have retained my US citizenship, for right or wrong. Many of you know that as a “benefit” to being an American citizen living abroad, I have to file a US federal tax return to report my worldwide income, no matter where I work or call home. Yes, the US “taxman” gets to have a hand in my pocket even though they are well aware I’ve been on Swiss terra firma since 2001.

I work with a US CPA that lives in Switzerland – another expat like me, married to a Swiss, and having taken root here – and I’ve been working with him for more than 10 years to manage the intricate dance of US filing when living abroad. Can you believe that my tax-free retirement plan in Switzerland is considered normal income in the US…because they don’t recognize the retirement plan?!?!

After filing my usual, annual extension for submitting my US taxes to mid-October this year, my CPA electronically submitted my paperwork with plenty of time to spare to meet the due date. I was done for yet another year, with only a couple of hundred dollars to pay back to the Treasury.

At the end of November, however, I returned home from a day in the office to find not one, but two letters from the U.S. Department of the Treasury, Bureau of the Fiscal Service. With the same fear that comes with getting a phone call at 2 in the morning, I nervously opened the letters.

The first envelope opened to the recognizable light-green and crème-colored “relic” of a bank check from the United States Treasury. It was a Tax Refund for the year 2023. I was actually getting money back from the US government when I had already paid them several hundred dollars two months earlier. Now that’s efficient!

I hit the jackpot…to the tune of $1.71!

I quickly opened the 2nd letter, and the excitement of seeing another check from the United States Treasury quickly gave way again to confusion over its value: $2.15. This one from a tax refund for 2018!

Think of the bigger picture: it costs me CHF (Swiss franc) 2.50 to mail a letter that weighs next to nothing from Switzerland to the US, and my assumption is that the same envelope and check would likely run USD 2.30 or so – “First Class Presort” - to get from the US to Switzerland. Hopefully the Treasury Dept gets a break on postage!

Still, the cost of sending me the check barely covered the actual value of each check! I received two of them, on the same day, that were results of tax years that are 5 years apart! How much did it cost to create and put each one in an envelope, outside of the $2.00 or more postage? And if all that isn’t absurd enough, here’s the cherry on top: UBS Switzerland charges me CHF 100.00 for cashing a US check.

So now I have these checks that are worth less than what it will take me to cash them. I won’t be back in the US for two months, and is $3.86 worth running around trying to cash them when I do? Why couldn’t they just credit these funds back into what I owed this year? When I asked my accountant what I should do, he responded: “If you have a US bank account you can direct deposit them using e-banking. Otherwise, you can frame them!”

I’ve read different estimates putting the number of Americans that live outside of the US anywhere from as few as 3 million, to as many as 10 million. What else is the US wasting money on if they insist on sending Mr. Schamber in the Zurich Oberland two dollars per check? This isn’t the first time I could only nervously laugh at the tragicomic waste of the US government. You might remember that I also received covid stimulus checks back in 2020, even signed by our then former and out-going president, Mr. Donald Trump? Revisit that shock here.

It is stories like these that remind me all too well of my father, who was professional army in the US for 40 years and as a supply sergeant, was ordering toilet seats for the military at well over $200/seat…in the 1980’s! Let’s face it: Elon better roll up his sleeves, as he surely has his work cut out for him. Tackling US government waste is a job that will take lifetimes to clean up.

Oh, as far as my CPA’s advice to “frame” the checks, it’s actually a great idea. I’ll add them to the other six checks I’ve received since 2018…which they keep sending me as I only have one year to deposit or cash them!

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